Double Dance Duties

On Christmas Eve myself, my friend and her sister went to a newly opened salsa club in Cali. I´ve already talked about how appalling my dancing is and I avoid it wherever possible. God knows what I´m doing in Colombia then, because here it´s a way of life and everyone dances perfectly. Unfortunately for me and them, coz I was the only guy in the party I had to dance twice as much as I otherwise would have. To be honest though, after a bottle of tequila, I started to quite enjoy it and jesus oh jesus the women, the women.

At the end of the night the bill was presented to me costing, for Colombia, a staggering 150 euros. Everytime I use my card in Colombia they ask me a question along the lines of ´what number is it? Is it 1, 2 or 3?´ I´ve been asked this quetion a dozen times and I still don´t know what it means, but I know the answer is ´1´. So if you´re in Colombia and someone asks you a question like this, just say ´1´ and you´ll be fine.

We then took a taxi back , unfinished bottles of Tequila and Whisky in hand, arriving at 6am at bit worse for wear. They decided we were going to their mother´s house for food. I decided that I wasn´t and that I wanted to go to bed. ´Well I dont have the key to the house, you´ll have to come in´ There were obvious holes in this story, like if she didnt have the key how was she gonna get in, so I decided I was going to a hotel to sleep. I knew this was gonna look really bad, but I was pissed and absolutely exhausted, so after wrestling closed the passenger door from Yurley I said to the taxi driver ´Take me to a decent hotel´. Unfortunately, the taxi driver was obviously a big fan of the Dukes of Hazard, because as soon as I said this he sped away with the noisiest wheel spin, giving the situation much more drama than I intended.

I think I was a little optimistic asking for the best hotel in town, because there´s only one (plus a few love motels). So at 7am I checked into Palmira´s finest hotel, Hotel El Dorado, probably the only gringo ever to stay there, looking not a little rough, pissed and desperate for some sleep. It then dawned on me that I didn´t have my friend´s address or phone number with me, but I figured two things: firstly, I don´t give a shit I just want some sleep, secondly, I bet she´ll come looking for me. The second happened about 30 seconds after I´d thought of it. There was a call, ´Senor, there´s a xxxxxx here´ Sorry, I´m tired, I dont want to take any calls´. 5 minutes later, she´s at my door, a little unhappy. I spent the next two hours trying to get her and her sister out because all I wanted was some sleep, but drink had gotten the better of us all, so at 9.30 after several hours of arguing in my limited Spanish we gave up and went for breakfast, bottles of tequila and whisky in hand.

I´m off to Cali today for a couple of days. I was unsuccessful in my attempts to do this trip solo, but it should be fun nevertheless, there´s a big feria in Cali over the Christmas period, something like Mardi Gras I´m told. Hasta luego.